what i've been prepare?


there's 5 months left, what i've been prepare?

of course my mind getting louder time by time. Knowing that i was not putting my hard work offer everything i have to. This feeling started when i was a kid. I always get good grades, or reward, even i dont work for it. it's just happend. I can say that i just living among the people that did'nt had that much ambition. So do i.


there's 5 months left, 17 is gettin closer.

You don't have to tell me about the relation between hardwork and success. I've heard a lot about it. Fyi, i used an aliby to avoiding that. I said, "im a perfectionist, thats why i procrestinating a lot.", or "im an overthinker, that's why is harder to me to start somethin' new and hoping for good result". I was soo crazy thinking about, what if i being a loser?

I am a loser. Having no brave to take a step. That's a loser.


Having 5 months left, for celebrate the arrival of 17. Is like a fight to me,

If i was having a fight with my sister, i can take time, to not talk to her. Or going anywhere that i don't have to meet her. But unfortunely, this fight is worse. Cause, tell me a place that u can't meet yourself, cause you were having a fight with her?

This time, is you were pushed to decide, between what you want, or what you need. Based on the clue that you get from someone that have been trough life before you. I have to fight with Hani that wanted to sleep, play and eat everytime, and let the task just pile up on the desk. While other Hani wanted to have a big house, happy family, and a good career in the future. 

In the end of 17, did you already do what you want, Hani? 

Sorry for always choose a short way to be happy without consider your future, i hope you can bear it well. 

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